Naughty First

I was married for twenty years to a man I thought was my idol. He gave me three of the most beautiful children I have ever seen. We had a life that others would idol, and completed the picture with a cute dog. Nobody on the outside ever knew that we were having problems, hell our own children did not even know we were having problems. I was in denial, i never wanted to admit that our picture perfect life with three great kids, one cute dog, and one cute couple did not exist. It never existed. We married right after high school and went to the same college, our kids happened right after we graduated. I remember how at night in high school when we were together he would hug me tight and promise that we would always be together, that he was going to come home every night and hug me, and how he swore he would protect me. I never thought that one day the man i trusted more then anyone else in the world, the man i thought was my idol, and the man who fathered my children would cheat on me.

After our divorce my friends were instantly at my side. They wanted to help me through a crisis I thought would never end. I mean here i was thirty eight years old, mother of three, and working. I had no potential, my kids were the only reason I had to get out of bed in the morning.

A few months into my newly single life, things had gotten a bit better, I was getting more used to the idea of not having a man around. My kids even seemed to be adjusting well enough to their new environment. One day when my sister came over she even suggested I get back into the dating game. adult dating was something i had never done before, I met my ex when I was sixteen and married him at eighteen, what did I know about dating as an adult? Nothing. So now I always seem to find myself trying to hug my kids and promise them things I know they'll get.