Naughty First

gay dating can be quite a sweet experience for a same Sex couple. I myself have no experience of this myself, because I am not gay. In fact, I'm just plain old single and boring, having never experienced the joy of intimacy with another human being in all my life. Good God I'm boring. Still, mustn't complain. Actually, no I must, because it really isn't fair. The people around me seem to be going at it like rabbits, and I get nothing at all? Why? What do they have that is lacking in my good self (except looks and attractiveness and all that other good stuff, of course).

I just reread that first sentence, and realised that actually it makes no sense at all. Why would a couple be dating? If they're already a Couple then that's it, they're together and all's well that ends well and they can get on with the serious business of having sex. And lots of it. Without me.

You can see from the serious error I made in the first sentence that I am by no means an expert in this field, but nevertheless I shall endeavour to continue to share with you my unsubstantiated thoughts on this topic. Feel free to go make yourselves a cup of hot Sweet tea, or take a bath for several hours. Or have a bath in some hot sweet tea. Perhaps if you do have a bath, you could ask your rubber duck for further information on this highly interesting subject, because he's sure to know more about it than I do. Rubber ducks are far more intelligent than most people realise, as I'm sure you're aware. And if you're not, just ask the duck. He sees, hears and knows all.

Sex is something that all couples seem to indulge in at some time or another, unless they are a couple who do not do that sort of thing in which case they should be run over by a steamroller because they've got absolutely no right whatsoever to go on living their lives if they're just going to keep disproving my theories all the damn time.